Friday, January 11, 2008

Okay, So Here's the Latest.

My boyfriend and I continue to be madly in love. It's been nearly two months since our first meeting, and we talk for at least an hour every night before bed. We typically see each other on weekends, although he came over last night (Thursday) for a little visit.

We got to talking about my ex, whom he has met. He asked, "May I pry? Why did you break up with him again?" I reminded him of the reason-- that the ex had met someone else (online, long-distance, whom he had never met face-to-face) and fallen in love. I took that as my cue to end what was already a sad relationship. Ex and I had not been intimate for quite sometime, and we had fallen out of love.

This panicked the Boyfriend, who immediately became concerned that our "no sex for six months" rule would take its toll on me and cause the end of the relationship. I calmed his fears as best I could, reminding him that I wanted to honor the decision we had made. Well, we ended up getting extremely intimate, and exploring some new activities while not actually experiencing the "big event." I told him that I didn't want him to compromise his ideals, that I was willing to wait until May. I assured him that I wasn't going anywhere, and that the intimacy and affection we share is already so far beyond what I have ever enjoyed with anyone else (especially the ex) that I have no qualms about waiting for sex (or "making love," as he insists it will be called).

It was really heartfelt and open, and I am so loving that we are letting it unfold. I have a feeling it won't be six months before we actually consummate the relationship, and that it will happen when it feels right for both of us. Meantime, it's so great to discover each other's bodies, features, skin, lips, hair a little at a time. It's like unwrapping a present when you already know what's inside. Like, "I know it's a sweater, but what color? What is it made of? I hate to tear this beautiful paper, so I'm going to take my time. I can wear the sweater and enjoy it as much as I want after I see it, but I only get to open it for the first time once. I want it to last."

Take it slow, breathe, relax, let it happen...

3 comments:

Gregory said...

Good luck on that! I don't foresee a lot of success either on the 6 months...

Java said...

As Captain Barbosa might say, "Six months is more of a guideline."

I love the way you two are taking it slowly, taking time to explore many facets of each other and getting to really know each other. There can be a huge difference between having sex and making love. Although you two may not have technically "had sex" (yet!) it sounds as though you started making love a few weeks ago. Cheek to cheek, heart to heart, skin to skin, eye to eye. That's love, baby. Knowing each other so well, when it does get into the "sex" category, it will be a fullfilment of the love, and will truly be Making Love. IMHO.

Mark in DE said...

It sounds like you two are creating a wonderfully open communication pattern that will serve you well in your relationship. Loved your analogy of unwrapping a present!

Mark :-)

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